Making Time Stand Still

“It is not enough to be industrious; so are the ants. What are you industrious about?”—Henry David Thoreau

Recently I was looking at my calendar, trying to make several different events happen in a very short period of time. After wrestling with the complex schedules of a bunch of different people, it all worked out, but honestly, it was like herding cats on Red Bull. Why are we all so busy? It was like a giant cluster of Venn diagrams of overlapping commitments, sports games, jobs, and activities. 

Our family is not one that over-schedules. My children don’t do five varsity sports, four school clubs, three part-time jobs, two service projects, and a partridge in a…well you get the idea. The grown boys have jobs, as do my daughter and I, and she has high school and one sport per season. We are not celebrities or sought-after athletes, but wrangling everyone’s schedule sometimes makes it seem that way.

My general feeling has always been that much of what is going on when we say we are “so busy” is really not all that. If something life-altering were to come up in amongst the appointments, homework, games, and responsibilities, we’d make it happen. The events that don’t matter would fall away and what must be done, would get done. It always does, right? It’s just so frustrating in the middle of it when all you want is to know where you have to be and when you have to be there.

 As always, my inability to be organized, physically and mentally, is usually to blame, but I’m beginning to think it’s more than that. Yes, there are times when I cannot find my arse in the bathtub, much less fight my way out of a scheduling conflict, but one of these days, it’s just going to hit critical mass. The need to simplify will take over and the next thing you know I will head for a cabin in the woods with a book, a bag of Fritos and my Snoopy blanket, completely cutting myself off from technology, errands, and my Day Planner. Ok, wait a second; that isn’t ever going to happen. I’d be hightailing it home by supper, twitching from iPhone withdrawal and a near-fatal case of FOMO. Still, sometimes it’s tempting to just walk away from everything we “have” to do.

I’ve seen a quote, from Mother Theresa, about not using time as an excuse. We should not say “I don’t have time” because every person has the same amount of time. We all get 24 hours a day. We have to sleep, most of us have to work and care for our families, but along with all of that, how much time do we all waste each day? Whether it’s staring at our phones, surfing the Internet to find out if penguins have knees (they do, you just can’t see them under the feathers) or binge-watching the latest sci-fi series on Netflix, the time is there if we want to do the work to find it. It’s not easy, not even a little bit, and to those who always look like they have everything completely pulled together and never miss an appointment or muck up a deadline, you have my utmost respect and admiration. Maybe it’s a perception issue? Perhaps we are all struggling to tame our calendars, organize time with family and friends and slow things down a little? What if it’s just that some people make it look easier and we are all just madly scrambling around crossing off dates and loading up to-do lists?

I'm going to try not to concentrate on how each day begins or ends, regarding time and tasks.  I won't think about how many hours or minutes I have left to get everything done. It's like seeing a movie in a big screen theater versus a small television set. I don't want to miss any part of it; I want the full width of whatever I do. Constantly checking my calendar, my children’s schedules, work deadlines, and appointments takes away from the meaningful experiences I want to have. Running on time is for trains, planes, and marathoners. Being present in the moments that matter is more important.