Homework Hassles

“Education is a natural process spontaneously carried out by the human individual, and is acquired not by listening to words but by experiences upon the environment."

---Dr. Maria Montessori

Growing up, my parents were as serious as a heart attack about school. My father was elected to his hometown school committee long before he ever had children. My mother chose to go to a private Catholic high school using her babysitting money because the public schools were, in her mind, "Not up to the task." She wanted more than sewing class and home ec. In private school, she was allowed to take biology and physics instead, and when she graduated, she joined the Navy as part of a flight crew. While neither of my parents went to college, they were two of the most educated people I've ever known.

 Naturally, when I had kids, I was committed to being the "Education Mom." I bought flashcards and worksheets the summer leading up to the first day of Kindergarten for my oldest. As a writer, I filled the house with books. The answer was never “No” if we were out and he wanted to buy a book. Not that math and science and history are not important subjects, but it mattered a great deal to me that my kids learn to love words. Reading, writing, and really, almost every other subject in school all starts with having the right words.  Looking back, I think I might have been overdoing it. This was pointed out to me when I went to my first back to school night and read the cute note that all the kids leave for their mom or dad on their tiny little desks. For what it's worth, it's overkill to take a red marker and make edits in the margins. Sorry, Andy.

Once my other two children came along, I relaxed. Schoolwork was (and still is) always a priority, but I didn't go all Tiger Mother about it. With my first, I would never have considered giving him an answer to a math problem. Mostly because once he got past third grade, I usually didn't know the answers, but still, homework was his job, not mine.

Now, with my third? Yes, OK, maybe back in elementary school I "helped" her with the spelling word sentences a few times. I specifically remember her thinking the word “underdog” referred to body parts that were on the underneath of our puppy, Oscar, the Wonder Pug. There was no way she was going to school having written, "Oscar likes to lick his underdog parts." That wasn’t something I wanted on her permanent record.

Homework has changed over the years; actually, it seems to change every school year. With each new teacher, new grade, and new school, the homework issue morphs into something different. The teachers I always respected the most and who were genuinely gifted educators, were the ones who didn’t make a big fat hairy deal over homework.  They looked at the child’s entire set of skills. What they did well, what they needed help with, and they went from there. 

If I had my way? Homework would cease to exist. While my background isn’t in child development or education, I’ve read and written about enough neuroscience studies to know a little bit about how the brain works, and pages of math facts, test prep worksheets, and arts and crafts do almost nothing to help children really learn. The dreaded "Group Projects" should be entirely done during school hours because then there is no 9:30 PM mad dash to Staples for poster board, note cards and at least one impossible to find item like green play dough. Then it becomes a Google search for "Playdough recipes" at ten o'clock because your kid forgot to tell you his part of the eco-system project was pond scum. Children are already too busy, and so are their families. Most homework, in my not-so-humble-opinion, is a waste of the precious hours kids have after school.

We need to take education seriously, but it doesn’t need to involve math homework that takes ten minutes to finish the equations and another hour to illustrate a cartoon story of Pete Protractor and the Pythagorean theorem. Why do students in some other countries have higher test scores than we do? Because they don’t color in math class, that’s why. 

Homework is here to stay, despite a lot of evidence that it doesn't improve the education our kids are getting. I just wish it could be more thought-provoking than the latest photocopies of MCAS "practice" tests and more relevant than whatever bits of glue and construction paper you can shove into a shoebox diorama. But what do I know, I got all the way through college without ever having to make a model of the Great Wall of China out of sugar cubes. It's a wonder I can think at all.

The Times They Are A-Changing

“Come gather 'round people
Wherever you roam
And admit that the waters
Around you have grown
And accept it that soon
You'll be drenched to the bone.
If your time to you
Is worth savin'
Then you better start swimmin'
Or you'll sink like a stone
For the times they are a-changin'.”

--Bob Dylan

This song came up on a playlist I found on Spotify that included the songs that were popular in any given year. I chose 1964 because it’s the year I was born. Also, the last half of the 1960s fascinates me because while it was a tumultuous period in history, in so many ways, it’s also a period where my memories may or may not be accurate. It’s like I have to know what was really going on then. My parents are no longer here to tell me about what it was like having two small children toddling around while world leaders were being shot on a regular basis, some students had to go to school with armed guards around them, and, to make it interesting, astronauts were hopping around on the moon.

Change can be scary. The character of Sheldon on the show “The Big Bang Theory” is an extreme example of someone resistant to change, but it’s probably fair to say we all have a little Sheldon in us. We have our favorite spots in our favorite places, we delight in the familiarity of having a coffee, or a sandwich made just the way we like it, every time. How many of us buy the same flavor of yogurt every week? The same kind of chips or the same brand of cereal? Sure, that strawberry kiwi flavor is excellent, but would a couple of containers of peach mango kill you? So maybe you like those three little hyperactive guys on the Rice Krispie box, but take a step outside your comfort zone and have a bowl of corn flakes once in a while. Don’t be a chicken; buy the rippled chips instead of the same old kettle cooked and take a walk on the wild side.

OK, enough about the groceries, because Bob Dylan wasn’t talking about your weekly trip to Stop and Shop when he sang this song. He was saying that despite what side we stood on, we were all dangerously close to the edge of a massive leap into a stormy sea of the unknown. Sink or swim? Hmmm…sounds like a great book title…but I digress. While it may not be the 1960s anymore, it’s universally true that in any decade, year, month or week, the times are always a-changin. We don’t even have to look at the national or world stage to see it either. Been a busy week or two in local politics, hasn’t it? While it has to be difficult for those right in the thick of it, some of it had to happen. Change is a critical part of growth, and especially when it comes to educating our children, growth is essential, even when it hurts.

Change doesn’t have to be quite as earth-shattering as what was happening when Dylan sang about it though. Every day we can look for what isn’t working in our own small bubble, whether it’s a job, a home, or just a pair of shoes and shake it up. Making the world a better place doesn’t just happen with fire hoses and freedom marches, it can be as simple as volunteering for a cause you believe in, reading a book by an author you never heard of, or sitting across from someone you have nothing in common with and hearing them out. Seriously, listening to another side of an issue has literally no downside. What’s the worst that could happen, you might learn something? G-d forbid some new ideas creep into your life, anything but that!

Sarcasm aside, it’s important to remember that what’s happening now in politics, locally and otherwise, is what is supposed to happen. Dylan warns “Come senators, congressmen/Please heed the call/Don't stand in the doorway/Don't block up the hall,” but it’s good advice for all of us, not just those in Washington. He was referring to the relevant events of those turbulent years, but let’s remember, the man won a Nobel Prize. He’s not your average 60’s hippie. It must have freaked him out a little too since it took him six months to accept it. Change is all around us, so we should probably get used to it and at least try to ensure that when it does come to us, it moves us forward and makes us better.

What a Long Strange Trip It's Been

So…what’s new? Did you miss me? Ha! Kidding, of course. For the record, I have missed writing in this space, and it’s great to be back. Because the Wicked Local/Marblehead Reporter staff is so fantastic, the decision was made to suspend this column during my campaign for school committee. No candidate should have the advantage of weekly ink, so a break was best, and this paper is lucky to have editors and staff that have the integrity to know that. 

The totals are out now, and it’s clear that I did not win a seat, but it doesn’t matter, they have a full board now, and everyone on it will be awesome. What I learned running for office was worth every minute of the last six weeks. First off, I was not paying enough attention. I didn’t get into the race until the last day to file papers, and that’s on me. It may have been a late start, but hitting the ground running is a specialty of mine. Literally, every time I run, I eventually hit the ground. Wait, that’s not what that expression means is it? Anyway, when I ultimately decide to do something, I go full bore at it, much like Wile E. Coyote going over a cliff strapped to a rocket. My father, who was successful in all of his elections for school committee back in the day, always said, “Go big, or stay the hell home.”  OK, Dad, I did. And boy does that ground come up at you fast.

Now, I am educated; I earned a degree in English with a minor in Political science, but that was :::mumblemumble::: something years ago and none of those classes in constitutional law or political theory helped at all. Running for local office (and Tip O’Neill was right when he said all politics is local) is a process that while phenomenal, and a reminder that democracy lives, is one heck of a ride. Here’s what I learned.

1)    Tim Green at Ace Hardware is the helpful hardware man. If it were not for him, I would likely have put out an eye trying to load the heavy-duty stapler. I know I should all be all “Hear me roar” because capable women rock, but sorry, I grew up in the sixties, the only power tools I got to use were a hand mixer and a blender. Once I had it down though? I was a stapling champ with my signs and my posts.  Tory, another capable woman who, unlike me, can saw stuff in half and use a hammer without winding up the ER was there to help too, and it wouldn’t have happened without her.

2)    People are amazing. Sometimes. I had the great fortune to have good friends helping me, from running around in my car deploying signs, to coming to coffees and helping me organize events and social media. There were also a few who were not so amazing, but that’s what politics is. A whole bunch of people, all of whom have opinions. Clearly not everyone agreed with me on some issues, but that’s a good thing, in my opinion. If you want to have a real community where all are welcome in the process, you’re going to have those with whom you disagree. Talk to them anyway. And keep talking.

3)    Being on television, even a local access program, is gut-wrenching for someone like me with no fashion sense and no filter.  While there were only a few events that involved video, it was enough to send me into a writhing anxiety attack in front of my closet of boring mom clothes.  The League of Women Voters put on an amazing event to showcase the candidates, and my goal was to not get freaked out and let loose with my normal “colorful” vocabulary which is that of a well-educated sailor. Members of my family bet me I couldn’t do it. Ha, at least I won that round.

4)    Rain at 5pm on Election Day is a dream killer, especially when it comes with thunder and lightning. Many people vote after work, but in a downpour, not so much. And so it goes.

5)    Saying “I should” about something, but never actually doing it is for losers. So my campaign didn’t work out, so what? What did I lose? One thumbnail, a few bucks for signs and some votes. No biggy. I met people, I learned about a process from the inside out and I only fell down once, and thankfully I wasn’t carrying the stapler at the time. Don’t say, “I should” when “I will” is what is needed to make it happen. Good luck to all of our elected officials. They’re going to need it. In the meantime, what’s next?