Is The World Really Your Oyster?

"To each his own magic."

--Libba Bray

Of course, we all say something similar. "To each their own" or "Everyone is different" or "Each to his own way." My personal favorite is "You do you, honey" but I have to cop to it being a bit snarky most of the time. These phrases that essentially say, "I'm OK, you're OK, everyone is OK" are somewhat meaningless platitudes, however. They are trendy like "You only live once!" or "You go your way, and I'll go mine," but they add nothing to the discussion.  Sure, we can all do what we like, within reason anyway. The problem becomes when everyone is sitting around just doing their own thing there is no community. Where is the joining together?

World events, political and otherwise, seem to get more chaotic every day. No matter where you look, it's getting a little loony out there. Call me picky, but while I like a good national defense, I'd prefer there not be saber-rattling and button pushing on Twitter. I would rather there be a debate, some discourse, a lively discussion and probably drinks too, now that I think about it.  We don't all have to hold hands and buy the world a Coke, that's useless, and not everyone even likes Coca-Cola. Also, it's flu season, and I'm not touching anyone's hands if I don't know where they've been.  Still. Everyone is off with "their own," and it's not getting us anywhere, seriously, it's just not.

In high school, I read a short story by O. Henry called, "The Third Ingredient." Two people, both down on their luck, have one ingredient a piece for a stew. They still need a third though.  Eventually, they do find someone with the final item, and these three enjoy a lovely meal because, while each had "their own" it didn't amount to anything without the rest of the parts. That's where "to each, his own" isn't always the best way to be. There would have been no hearty meal if all three people hadn't come together to make it happen, each with their own…magic. Read the story; trust me.

It does work, however, when it comes to personal taste. I have a good friend who lives in Vermont, and while the short days of winter and the lack of sunlight can be problematic, she likes nothing better than a good storm that will dump a foot or two of snow at her door. If I never saw snow again, I would be delirious with joy. She says it's the perfect example of the grass always being greener on the other side of the fence. It's true. I'm sitting home now, still in my jammies, watching #Bombogenesis2018 rage on outside my window. While she would describe it as a winter wonderland, for me it's a harbinger of danger and disaster. She doesn't have children, so she often takes mine. I never have a quiet house, and so I frequently jump in my car to go sit on her couch where the only sound is the cat and the fireplace, both roaring, in their own way.

Someone I know, but have never met, was saying recently in a Facebook post (where all my imaginary friendships happen) that she told her son, "The world is your oyster!" To which he replied, "Well yes, unless you don't like seafood. Then it's just where you live." I've never met her son either, but that kid is going places, even if he does have some offbeat quirk that keeps him from liking nature's treasures from the sea, those delectable bits of shrimp and cod and yes, oysters, always the oysters. Perhaps the world is his steak sandwich or his piece of the pie? Smart kid that one, because he's not limiting himself to just one kind of world.

We all look around our lives with our own preferences, our own beliefs and that's as it should be.  Rather than letting that divide us, perhaps it should be what causes us to gather together? I like oysters; this kid doesn't. My friend loves snow, and I'm cursing the weather gods and searching homes for sale in Del Boca Vista, Florida. Why can't we look over at the person next to us at Starbucks, or in the grocery store, and ask them why they like the Yankees instead of the best baseball team on the planet, the Red Sox? Maybe if there's a discussion between a Bills fan and a Patriots fan, there will be something learned. At the very least, the Bills fan and the Yankees fan are both going to hear about some fantastic games; at least if they are sitting next to me. They don't have to switch teams, but since when is it a bad thing to glance over the fence and try to see another point of view?