Baaaah--maste!

“When we are aligned, everything can flow and life and yoga become effortless”

---Rebecca Hall

Goat yoga? Ya, It’s a Thing.

Ok, if this quote is correct, then sign me up for the chronically misaligned club. OK, who are we kidding, if there is such a thing, I need to be President. There is no way my life would ever be effortless, and, would I even want it to be? Also, if yoga is effortless then why can’t I do it at home, in my sweats, eating pizza and binge watching old episodes of Dynasty on YouTube? OK, that’s an impossible question, so, let’s leave it be.

 

I’ve tried yoga before and really, I swear to Ganesha, I wanted to like it. I do, actually, really like the concept, it’s just my basic Irish temper and twitchiness that keeps me from getting there. Also, the fact that no matter how Zen I become, my right foot is never going to touch my left ear. If G-d wanted me to do that, he’d have made me a German pretzel. However, I have this one very special friend and it was her birthday. She is considerably younger and more flexible than I am (or ever will be) and she’s an animal lover. So, what to plan for the perfect girls’ day out? Goat yoga, of course.

It should be noted, right up front, that I am not a fan of nature or wildlife. Wildlife meaning anything besides a dog or a cat. Rural, to me, is the organic fruit aisle at Market Basket. So of course, a country road, a field of goats, and the prospect of falling on my face during a downward dog had me jumping at the chance to defy the laws of gravity whilst communing with a heard of cloven-hooved farm animals. Oh, pro tip: fainting goats really do faint. It’s scary for yoga girls, but the goats are totally fine with it, so don’t run about shrieking for someone to dial 911.

Once we were all set up on mats and conscious, the yoga instructor started to lead us through some basic instructions. Mostly about the goats. Yoga isn’t that specific; it’s about flexibility, and the moves can be modified based on your ability. Goats, however, are pretty stubborn, in a cute way, and faced with a lawn full of sweaty city slickers in designer sweats, they do what they want. 

They will eat the grass, they will hop on your back and sniff your hair, and oh, all that grass they eat? You’ll see it again, wherever they feel like dropping it.  The farm my friend and I were at has a wonderful staff who are there to help the goats navigate safely, take cute pictures and brush away any small droppings. They are amazing.

So, while the yoga is ongoing, I’m looking at my friend who is really good at this. Not only can she do all the moves, but the goats really liked her! None of the goats wanted a piggy back from me, except that kind of big one, and I’m sorry, he was a little too nosy for me, I mean, come on, buy a girl a drink or something, right? Ha, I kid. And, yes, these goats were just kids too, babies basically, and really very sweet. As it happens, goats are tagged on the right ear if they are girls, and the left if they are boys. Because girls are always right…hey, don’t write angry letters, I’m not the goat queen, I don’t make the rules.

As the class came to an end, there was time to cuddle the goats and get to know them. At least one of them knew me pretty well at that point, but who knows if he’ll call? All jokes aside, it was really the best time I’ve ever had with animals, and like, grass and dirt. Probably because I had a good friend with me. There is literally no one else on the planet I would want with me while attempting to meditate with furry cheese makers. It’s important to get out of your bubble and do something different. Drive to a farm, play with goats, get bendy. I guarantee it’s like nothing you’ve ever done…well, most of you anyway. And bring a friend. You’ll love it. I’m definitely going back, who want to come? As a friend said, it’s all about honoring the light within us all….bahhhhhh maste!

Great Rock Farm on Pond Street in Georgetown MA has several goat yoga classes available. Check them out at www.goatstogo.farm