OMG, Can I really do this?

“Above all else, deep in my soul, I'm a tough Irishwoman.”

---Maureen O’Hara

Irish I am, and Irish I will always be. No matter what, I have won the genetic lottery, having been gifted with red hair and green eyes and a wicked attitude. When I was little, my father told me that this hair and these eyes were proof that I was descended from the kings of Ireland.  The attitude was just a bonus.  While I would always be his princess, I was, by definition, a daughter of royalty, a daughter of Ireland and all that entailed. Also...attitude.

And yet, while we Irish are known for being as tough as nails, tonite I am in a puddle of self-doubt and worry. All of my own doing. The local bookstore, an institution of good literature and good authors, is having me in for a signing. Which is great and the culmination of a lot of work and promotion and pestering.  My gratitude for this opportunity knows no bounds. And then, in creeps the anxiety, doubt and worry. Because writing a book is much like having a baby. Except then you have to drag that baby around to strangers and ask them, “Is this a good baby?” “How did I do having this baby?” “Do you like this baby?” “Should I have more babies?” and all of that begs the question,  “Am I good enough?”

I have no idea if I am good enough, nor do I know how “good enough” is defined. I wrote this book. I hope you like it. If you don’t can we please keep that our little secret? If you do, buy a copy. Either way, I offer up my point of view. My experience. It isn't a book that tells you what life is. It's not a book that tells you want to do. It's just a book about what I have done. Right or wrong, good or bad, what life is or is not. How should I know what life is? Never would I be so bold as to tell anyone what life is, what parenting is, or what it's all supposed to be about.  Here is what worked for me. It's a chronicle of what has happened to me and how I have dealt with it. Hint: I’ve not always done so well dealing with everything that has landed on me. I talk about sinking or swimming. The motto “Fluctuat nec mergitur” comes to mind. It’s Latin, which every good Catholic knows a bit of and it means “Tossed but not sunken.” I have not sunk, nor will I, but I need help staying afloat. We all need that. Buy the book if you want, but if not? No worries.  Just spare me a good thought and wish me luck. Thanks. Maureen O'Hara remains an inspiration to me. Because. Irish girls.